#107 An Open Letter To Vera Wang And Making Music 4
In defense of boobs...
Dear Vera,
I have boobs.
They are ample.
This does not mean I am a size 14 or above.
I am an 8-10.
You design a LOT of apparel aimed at my size range.
In fact, your designs are the first thing to greet me at the entrance to the women’s department at my local clothing emporium. It is impossible to miss the several mannequins decked out in all their Vera Wang glory.
Those plastic beauties look great in your clothes. So great that I almost always take the bait, grab 5 or 6 pieces and head for the fitting rooms.
Where I don article after article that hangs wrong, sits wrong, drapes wrong and just generally DOES NOT WORK on my body.
I actually bought a robe once, assuming it would fit fine with no need to try it on.
I mean - what can go wrong with a robe, for Pete's sake?!
Big mistake.
What can go wrong is that the darn thing wouldn’t stay closed. I tried tying it with every tie it possessed - inside and out - to no avail. It just kept coming open.
In, you guessed it, the boob area.
Husband thought it was fine - me, not so much.
I eventually gave up and sent it off to my local St. Vincent De Paul in hopes that it would make some less amply endowed soul happy.
You may think I am over simplifying when I place the blame for my bad experiences with your designs on the presence of a full figured bust. But, if you could see me wearing your clothes you would have to agree. There is nothing weird about my body. I'm just an average person.
Maybe the real problem here is those store mannequins.
Perhaps you have surrounded yourself with fashion models of mannequin-esque stature and flat chestedness.
Then again, I've seen pictures of you and you're no "D cup" yourself so maybe you just design clothes that will look good on you.
Which would be perfectly fine if you were content to tailor your product (no pun intended) to a niche clientele.
But when you boldly market your wares to a big chain like Kohls (headquartered in Wisconsin - one of the "full figured" capitols of the US) I really feel someone needs to call this problem to your attention.
Because when we try on your clothes and they look awful on us we take it personally.
You're famous. You design for stars. We feel as though you couldn't possibly be at fault with all your massive designer skills.
The problem must be us.
Maybe we need to go on a diet.
I did that.
Lost ten pounds.
Didn't help a bit.
Except to prove that my size is actually NOT the problem.
The problem is the boobs. And the fact that your clothes simply are NOT designed to accommodate them.
I'm done blaming myself.
I blame you.
And until you come up with something that takes my bust into account I'm afraid I have to be done with you.
You may think you don't need me or my business. That's your prerogative.
But you're missing a BIG market.
Pun intended.
Copyright© 2025 Anne Morse Hambrock All rights reserved.
Finding Light In The Dark
As I mentioned in issue #105 I will be giving a talk that is open to the public in a few weeks.
“Anne Morse Hambrock: Finding Light in the Dark"
Date and Time: Sunday May 18th 3:00 p.m.
Location: White Lilac 5029 6th Ave Kenosha WI
Tickets: $20 available online here
Making Music Installment 4
If you’ve been following this journey from the beginning, you know that I’ve been workshopping a new piece here on Substack and am still in the chord selection and “decide on a rhythm” phase.
Today’s sample is a waltz treatment. Partly because I thought a waltz would be fun and partly because I get tired of using the jazz or Celtic rhythms that I often find myself slipping into.
From The Garden
My favorite time of year for the front yard is late April and early May when the trees start to blossom and the Azalea and Creeping Phlox are in their full glory.
For the past few years we have had dazzling displays from the cherry tree (white blossoms) and the apple tree (pink blossoms) early in the season only to get zapped by a backlash of wintry weather that stunted fruit production.
This Spring seems to be more on track so I’m hoping for bumper crops.
Books
If you like my work there are two book collections for sale.
Cookies not included.
Note: Lately I’ve been getting book orders that seem to have fraudulent payment methods so my store is not letting those orders through. If you have tried to order a book without success please reach out to me and we will dig into the problem. Either reply to this newsletter or message me via substack.
Archives And New Subscribers
If you are just joining us I’m so happy you are here!
Consider poking around the archives - there’s some fun stuff.
Tip Jar
If what I am doing is helpful to you please consider dropping a little something in the tip jar.
A big THANK YOU to everyone who has donated! It really helps me keep going.
Bonus Image
My goofy collie boy with his toothy smile.
Keep The Messages And Comments Coming!
I appreciate the feedback and knowing how often I have struck a chord with your lives.
I like that piece -- dreamy with a slight edge to it. It says to me, "Relax, but keep your eyes open."
Understand that I'm no musician. 3 childhood years of piano lessons did nothing for me except teach me the math and some technicalities of a written piece of music. I don't understand what composers are "doing" in their music. I've heard musicians discuss certain classical pieces, talking about how ingenious this composer was because of what he did in this section and how that composer was poking fun in that section. I never know what they are talking about. I can't "see" a story in a piece of music unless dancers and/or singers are showing and telling me what's going on. I only know how the piece makes me feel, or maybe more accurately, what feelings I already have that the piece brings up.